thoughts from my bathroom mirror. pt 1.

This morning I had a moment in front of the mirror. Mid-bobby pin, I was thinking of all the sweetness of love and encouragement my friends and family have given me lately.

Kenzy texted me this morning to say how excited she is with the Saturday forecast. Randyl texted me to ask if I need a coffee or moment of normal. Maria asked me how she can pray for me. Rose came over to my house early in the morning to alter my dress. Emily and Joann let me crash on their couch numerous times before I can move in with Isaac. My bridesmaids are all getting work shifts off, driving hours to get here, and giving all their time this weekend to help however they can.

I COULD GO ON. This is the Emmy acceptance speech I’ll never get to give; let me have this.

After running down this list of sweetness this morning, I opened up Oswald Chamber’s Utmost devotion today. “Pouring out the water of satisfaction.” And it was perfect.

“So the three mighty men broke through the Philistine lines, drew water from the well near the gate of Bethlehem and carried it back to David. But he refused to drink it; instead, he poured it out before the Lord.”-2 Samuel 23:16

In 2 Samuel, David is at the cave of Adullam and is thirsty. Like really thirsty. The water brought back to him would have been so physically refreshing to him, but he knew the risk his men had taken to get it. He had just received this physical blessing of water, along with the blessing of men who put aside their own safety/comfort for his. As the water represented their sacrifice, he poured it out to God. It was too great for him to keep. We’re often given the gift of “friendship, love, or other spiritual blessings.” (Chambers) We are given so much by our Father. He is generous, extravagant, and rich in love. But it is not just for our own benefit but for His glory.

“As soon as I realize that something is too wonderful for me, that I am not worthy to receive it, and that it is not meant for a human being at all, I must pour it out ‘to the Lord.’” –Chambers.

This love and encouragement from my friends during “wedding week” and so many other weeks is one of these gifts. Too wonderful for me, something beyond what I’m worthy of, something resulting from Christ’s work in my friends. His love, grace, humility, and truth radiate from many people around me and reveal more of His glory to me. And that’s His work; so this is His gift.

“If you have become bitter and sour, it is because when God gave you a blessing you hoarded it. Yet if you had poured it out to Him, you would have been the sweetest person on earth. If you are always keeping blessings to yourself and never learning to pour out anything “to the Lord,” other people will never have their vision of God expanded through you.” –Chambers.

 

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I had an amazing weekend of relationship, renewal, and rest. I learned an incredible amount about missions, and am still working through the processing of it all. It’s the best kind of processing.

Spent some time on this website today. Read a blurb or two on Italy, and cannot wait to live there in the fall. Today, pray for Austria. 15% of their nation is unreached and do not know Christ’s name. Help from that comfy couch you’re sitting on right now!

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Keep Going.

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Whenever I need encouragement, He is faithful to provide it. Always.

 

Thankful that when I was feeling overwhelmed with school, He gave me diligence and productivity.
Thankful that when I was feeling discouraged with finding an internship, He provided two upcoming interviews.
Thankful that when I needed personal encouragement, He replaced lies with truth through words of great friends and perfect Scripture.

 

“Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you;

therefore he will rise up to show you compassion.”

         -Isaiah 30:18

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Football

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So there was a game on tonight. Here are some of my favorite quotes:

“It’s fine for Beyonce to do her jig, but if I were to do that, people would lust. It wouldn’t be good.”

“Wow, I didn’t know football could get any more boring. Until all the lights went out.”

“This is why I think murder should be legal.”

“He isn’t a freaking person, you moron. Don’t ever talk to me again.”

“The bacon just tastes like sugar, don’t even worry about it. Meat that tastes like sugar…this is what dreams are made of.”

“I sure hope no one at this half time show has epilepsy.”

“Yeah I just carried him in my backpack around camp. Cuz, ya know, the cancer.”

“Mmm, what’s a bananagram? That sounds good!”

“CAWWWWWWWW!”

Most of these are best heard completely out of context. Hope you all, like, won the Super Bowl?

Thankful for a new day.

I am a sinner. If it’s not one thing it’s another.
Caught up in words, tangled in lies.
But You are a Savior, and you take brokenness aside.
And you make it beautiful. Beautiful.
-All sons & daughters

 

Working on believing this more.

1 4 3 2

 

“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past.
See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.”
-Isaiah 43:18-19

 

1-4

Quit something today.

“WInners never quit, and quitters never win.”

Plastered on the walls of middle school locker rooms and printed in joker font on Pinterest boards entitled “Inspiration.” It protrudes from the mouths of freshman football coaches named Steve and condescendingly pours out from mothers who observe their child’s half-completed science projects. This quote is everywhere. And it’s not true. I’m probably not the first to figure this out, but I AM the first to put it on this specific blog. So you cannot take everything from me, okay?

Sometimes winners quit. And sometimes quitters win. Before I explain, allow me to set the scene: it was a Friday night. There I was, hair tied up, green Starbucks apron drooping below my knees, and fingers punching in the last four digits of my social security number. Clocking out for the last time at my seventh job to date. My anticipated relief for getting the heck out of there came, but was paired with a pit in my stomach for heaping yet another job to my work history pile. The self-conscious pit resembled my back-in-the-day neighborhood rascal, AJ: uninvited, annoying, and shirtless. 

Seven jobs, three cities, eleven roommates (soon to be 15), five musical activities of some kind, five sports, two newspapers, two magazines, five small groups, at least ten clubs. And I don’t even know HOW many bananas I’ve gone through since college??????!!!!!!!!!!!! Alas, here I am, leaving another job. Moving to another apartment in a month. My soul has out fickle-d all those other souls. It’s been runnin around tripping over basketballs I never could dribble between my legs and triple grande lattes with extra foam and caramel drizzle.

…This was my semi-dramatic internal reaction at the time clock. Wrapping my thoughts around the idea of quitting something rather than exchanging it for something else, I robbed myself of the freedom I craved. I took off my apron on the way to my car and began thinking about all my past jobs, schools, cities, and clubs. I pleasantly realized all of the memories were good. Most of them good because I genuinely loved the thing or the place or the person I encountered, and the others good because I am better for leaving that thing or that place or that person.

I’ve loved every place I’ve called home and all eleven girls I’ve gotten to live with are wonderful. I am absolutely terrible at basketball and bowling, but have wonderful memories from previous practices. I still respect every publication I’ve been a part of, and still love writing on my own. I have hated some of my jobs, and loved others, but I’ve learned at least one thing at all of them. And knowledge is GOLD, people. It gets you places. Hopefully better places than you’ve been before.

Quitting my last job has already harvested goodness. I get to go home for Thanksgiving and Christmas to see my family. I get to invest more in my second job, actually spend time with the girls in my connection group, write, and volunteer again. I can pour into things that pour right back in to me. This is just one recent example of how quitting a sour thing led me to a sweet thing, and I believe that’s called winning, folks. 

Experiences are great, and opportunities are blessings. So take them with grace and gratitude. Just remember that sometimes the blessing from an experience is found in the way that it leads you to something else. Growing old is all about maturing and better understanding joy and peace anyway. You receive deeper joy when you arrive at a better place, a better thing, a better relationship, and better practices. And do you know how you get something better? You quit something comparatively inferior.

 

Be content.

COOL! I bet he's content he's in this picture. I'm content I'm looking at it.

We can all grow in contentment.

“One who is content with what he has and who accepts the fact that he inevitably misses very much in life is far better off than the one who has much more but who worries about all he might be missing. For we can not make the best of what we are if our hearts are always divided between what we are and what we are not. We cannot be happy if we expect to live all the time at the highest peak of intensity. Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance and order and rhythm and harmony. Let us therefore learn to pass from one imperfect activity to another without worrying too much about what we are missing.”

-Thomas Merton.

^”A great old Catholic guy” according to Josh Miller.

Thanks Matt for the photos.

HAPPY MONDAY EVERYONE. Make it a funday.